Re-learning.
“Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect.” -Romans 12:2
Y’all. Here at CGA this past month and a half, I feel my mind is being totally renewed and settled into deeper truth about who God is and who I am in Him.
It’s crazy to think that in so little time, in our classes and in our practical application activities (called ‘activations’), I have absorbed so much. And it’s so much stuff that I know the Lord will be helping me explore this content and these truths as I learn walk it out for the rest of my life!
We’ve been reading some books periodically (I think we’ve read 3 books at this point), doing some Scripture memorization, studying the book Celebration of Discipline by Richard Foster (highly recommend!), engaging in community worship and meals, and gleaning from some amazing guest speakers from all spheres of society and influence.
CGA is no joke in the fact that we’re facing and discussing some heavy and deep topics, such as shame, emotional health, self-awareness models like the Myers-Briggs typology and the enneagram (PLEASE do yourself a favor and look these things up to help understand yourself a little better!), vulnerability, self-care, and influence to name a few.
Learning these things requires a lot of “inner work,” meaning a lot of reflection on the past and time looking at ourselves honestly in the mirror to see the good and not-so-great, the strengths and weaknesses. Amazingly, I’m learning to accept myself right where I am because my Father God does, which gives me the grace for myself that I can extend to others to love them right where they are too! I also get to look at the freedom and abundant life the Father calls me higher into and evaluate areas of my life that I could conform to His ways and things I could eliminate to be an overall healthier human. It’s all about knowing Him, and nothing else matters outside of that, but in knowing Him I get to find out who I am and ask to be transformed by Him to be that FULLY.
All the while, in the midst of all this amazing yet serious learning, I get to BE with the most grace-filled, loving, vibrant, and God-pursuing community! Which is such a gift from a gracious God!
I AM SO THANKFUL TO BE HERE!
Because of this hard work we’re engaging in with the excavation of our inner lives and letting His light hit the dark places we tend to hide from, I am more confidently walking WITH Him.
Walking in victory. Walking in identity.
We are tending to the care of our souls to be as utterly free as possible on this earth AND THEN to take others by the hand and help lead them into freedom as we help lead them to deeper truth in Christ and of who He is!!
FRIENDS, if I could explain to you how utterly CRUCIAL I feel all this I have been learning has been, I would. I know that this season of walking through healing and uprooting lies about myself and the world around me I have believed, having the freedom to try and fail, being in an honest community as we’re seeking to be more rooted in our lives to LEAD from that place of intimacy with God, is, as Jesus has been speaking to me lately, my “firm foundation” for the rest of my LIFE! To really live as a daughter of God, to be a more healthy and overflowingly loving daughter, friend, sister, co-worker, wife, mother, aunt, etc etc. The Lord is infiltrating more and more of my heart and life as I’m surrendering to Him, and though it can be painful and cause tension, HE is infiltrating every aspect of my life. It is ALL His and is all for His glory.
I am in a HARD place of seeing myself honestly, knowing I am a work in progress, but knowing I am enough. A place of seeing my weaknesses and my need for dependence on the Lord, but being met with SUCH GRACE as God delights to be our strength and source. He designed it this way. I feel oddly empowered and helpless at the same time. But I wouldn’t change this season. And I pray my dependence on the Lord and my outward following that reflects a completely devoted heart to Jesus exponentially grows until I meet Him face to face.
I never imagined the I would go on the World Race, and didn’t really even know the CGA program existed, yet the Lord is laying out my steps and has me right where HE wants me!
I think this picture depicts a lot of where I am. The Lord is uprooting some weeds, providing the necessities of some sun and the the very air I breathe, having placed me in the exact environment with the right conditions to GROW. And I am growing!! He is rooting me more deeply in Him, pruning away some things, painfully, but purposefully that I might bear more fruit for His glory.
“You did not choose me, but I chose you and appointed you that you should go and bear fruit and that your fruit should abide, so that whatever you ask the Father in my name, he may give it to you.” John 15:16.
THAT, friends and family, is what you are part of, what you are helping build in my life with the Lord! And it is incredible.
PHENOMENALLY I only have about $600 left to fundraise so that I can be fully funded and help lead a short term mission trip at the end of June with my CGA classmates!
My deadline is JUNE 1, so really if I received $25 a day in donations for the next 24 days, I’d be set!
If you’d like to donate to fully fund the rest of my semester with CGA, simply click the *DONATE* button above! [All donations are tax deductible as Adventures in Missions is a 501(c)3 organization!]
Thank you thank you thank you again! I hope to be better about sharing more specifics on all the topics we’re learning and being challenged to put into practice, but it’s hard because of the DEEP waters we’re wading through!
So pray for grace in that for me PLEASE! I SO desire to articulate all God is doing, and I will set aside more time to keep you all more informed and aware of what’s happening here in GA and all that you’re making possible through your gracious hearts and giving hands!
All my love,
Abby
